Sunsets

As I type this post, I’m sitting on the front porch of a beach house that my friends and I have rented for Spring Break on Tybee Island. There are these two white, old-fashioned lifeguard chairs on the porch that I’ve come to love. Sitting here allows me to see just over the house across the street and see the sun setting across the island.

The older I’ve gotten the more I’ve grown to love sunsets. There was even one night after practice that the sun was setting and it was giving the world this spectacular view to look at, so my roommate just automatically started driving so that I could get a picture, even though we knew we would miss dinner in the dining hall.

When the sun is setting, it’s a time of relaxation. People aren’t going downtown, people aren’t rushing around quite as much, it’s a time to take a deep breath and reflect a little bit. There’s just something so innocent and natural, yet magnificent and magical about a sunset that no matter how bright or colorful it leaves me thinking, “how could someone be looking at this and not believe in a God?”

For me, I see a sunset and I see another day ending, whether good or bad, and I see the hope for a better tomorrow. I see time moving, from the blue sky to the colors of the sunset, to the dark of the night, I see that I do not control time no matter how much I want to, but time controls me. I see the good memories from the day or replay the good memories form the past. I see my brother and sleeping in boxes when we were little because it was something of an adventure. I see scoring my first soccer goal and I see the car ride where I first remember my dad telling me he was proud of how I played that day. I see my mom and I dancing in the kitchen to the Dixie Chicks and I see my club team winning state. I see my whole senior high school season and I see my two best friends who have gotten me through life. I see my church family who has helped me grow and learn to let God love me and I see the day I decided to go to Berry College. I see all these beautiful things that to this day make me happier than anything in the world, and it comes so naturally. It’s an instant thought, it’s almost like a message from God saying, “This is why.”

Last night we were driving across the bridge in Tybee to go get a couple groceries for dinner through the week, and I promise there was one of the most beautiful sunsets I’ve ever seen. And for the first time, I didn’t think about all those memories. I thought about my bible study discussion this past week. Ever since I got diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, I’ve never believed in God’s plan. I didn’t believe that a God who was so loving and forgiving would give me a disease that I couldn’t prevent, or a God that was so good would give an infant cancer who hadn’t even seen how beautiful His world is yet. But in bible study, we’re reading this book, “When Life and Beliefs Collide,” and the author started talking about God’s plan, but it was in context of a tragedy. The super awesome lady who runs our study talked with us about what the author was trying to get across, and it really changed my whole view on God’s plan.

God is Love. God is Good. But if we knew no tragedy, would we still believe these things? If we felt no pain and saw no despair, would we see God’s work in our lives or in other’s lives?

Maybe God does have a plan. Maybe that plan includes tragedy and pain and despair and all the things that we hate to associate with a perfect, loving God. We don’t want to think that the one thing in our lives who we believe to be so good and so perfect is the one bringing on our pain and suffering.

But when you’ve faced trials and you’ve faced hardships, in the end, haven’t you been drawn closer to God?

If not, maybe you’re not at the end. Maybe we face these trials and struggles as a way to become closer with God. Maybe it’s a way to be a step closer with our Heavenly Father.

So as I look at the sunset tonight, fading away as the stars become brighter and this day comes to a close, I see something better than all those memories. I see pain and suffering and trials and despair and tears and obstacles. But I see God’s plan, even if it’s not every detail. I see all those hardships, but I see God with me the whole way.

If you have time tonight or tomorrow, I encourage you to go watch the sunset, take a deep breathe, and see what beauty God has left at the end of every day for us.